When I took Terrence Tao’s masterclass, which I later wrote about here, he recommended several books to read. One of those books was, Thinking 101 by Woo-kyoung Ahn. It was an easy book to read, filled with really interesting observations about so many of the ways that our thinking is often wrong or misguided, as well as Ahn’s suggestions on how to improve on those things.
Even though a lot of the ideas you’ve probably heard of before, the addition of Ahn’s suggested solutions to those potential mental pitfalls was a breath of fresh air. Most of the books in this similar vein usually fall short of offering any solutions. I appreciated her thoughtfulness and patience in taking the time to explain some of the more complicated sections.
In all honesty, I’ll probably be writing a few more essays in the near future dealing with a lot of the topics covered in that book. The mind is fascinating and there’s so much to learn and there’s much we can personally do to improve ourselves.
One thing that I want to talk about in this essay is negativity bias.
Negativity bias is a well documented psychological phenomenon that describes our tendency to remember and be influenced by negative information rather than positive information. We tend to give more weight to negative inputs over positive ones.
For example, one negative comment on something we posted online does more to our psyche than 99 positive comments. We’ve all been there to some degree or another. When you’re a writer and post your work online, I guarantee you that one negative review stings and it can almost overshadow all of the positive ones.
You could have a nearly perfect childhood, but one single traumatizing event can stick with you and torture you for decades to come. Negative events elicit deeper processing and consolidation in the brain, leading to more vivid and persistent memories compared to positive ones.
When it comes to decision making, our propensity to think negatively may make us too cautious and risk-averse, when in fact the chances of something turning out badly are extremely low. This can potentially cost us dearly in many areas of our lives, even in relationships.
If we go to a party and have a good time for 90 percent of the time, but one person says something rude, we tend to focus and ruminate on that and almost completely forget about all of the good that we experienced that evening.
Our brains are hardwired that way. We all experience this to some degree or another. However, just because we’re evolutionarily predisposed to negativity, it doesn’t mean that we can’t change it. The first step is crucial and you’re doing it right now. Awareness. I know, it’s simple and it’s almost cliché at this point, but becoming aware of the problem is the first step in changing it.
Another important step is to actively consider both the negative and the positive sides of any given situation. Balance is key here. Don’t spend too much time thinking about that one negative comment, or ruminating on all of the possible worse case scenarios. That’s not healthy. Again, balance adds perspective.
One more suggestion is to try and reframe negative thoughts in a more positive or neutral light. This will help you find the silver lining in difficult situations and will lead you to find ways to grow even through hardships.*
Of course, you can also try cognitive behavioral therapy, a topic that I want to discuss in the near future in more detail.
Wrapping Up
Negativity bias is real and it affects all of us, but it doesn’t have to control us. The suggestions I mentioned above are just a few of the steps we can take to live a more balanced life.
Have you noticed this in your life as well? I know I’m not the only one that would go over a negative comment or experience in my head over and over again. What are some other ways that you have found to challenge your negativity bias?
Thanks for reading.
Also, happy new year!
Hey Israel, that takes me back to my youth. When I was 14, our neighbour over the road was a flamenco aficionado. His son was learning flamenco guitar from a master guitarist and his daughter was studying flamenco dance. I would often go to their performances. My bedroom was a caravan at the bottom of our driveway and I was learning to play Delta Blues. My neighbour would call me over to his place to play for him. He would listen with interest and then he would say "What else have you got?" I would get really frustrated and go back to my caravan to listen to and learn another song or piece and practice it till my fingers were sore. I turned that 'perceived' negative into motivation to constantly do better. I took that through my life so that any time someone said something negative or disparaging about something I had done, I would focus on proving them wrong. Yes, that negative bias can sting sometimes, but you can also turn it into a tool. For what its worth, he was much harder on his son, having observed how the great flamenco guitarists in Andalusia were trained. For example the teacher would sometimes hold a lit cigar next to the students wrist to make them do all their work with their fingers and not the hands. Get it wrong and you got burnt. Also positive motivation, although I suspect many people would just quit, which I guess is the difference between the mediocre musician and the master. What I find more negative, perhaps as a consequence of my drive for excellence (not perfection which I don't believe exists) is when I play poorly, and someone tells me how good it was. That makes me search for a better audience lol.